Behind the Scenes
by Red Flames
Summary: A story of what life might be like behind the scenes of Dragonball Z, were it actually filmed. Everyone has a completely different personality. PG-13 for language. My first humor fic. And remember: I suck at summaries.


***** DISCLAIMER ***** I do not own any Dragonball characters, they are all copyrighted by Akira Toriyama, TOEI Animation, and FUNimation.  
  
Behind the Scenes  
  
Trunks stared the evil tyrant King Cold in the eyes. Filled with hatred, their glares remained fixed. Confident in his strength, Trunks began to taunt the giant alien.  
  
"So, you wanna see my... oh, kuso! What do I want him to see again?" he groaned as he messed up his lines yet again. King Cold sighed, and walked away from the backdrop to get some refreshments.  
  
"I can't stand that amateur! He can't get any of his lines right. I swear, he messes up one more line and I'm quitting." he sipped at his coffee and continued talking to Goku, who was slowly sipping at his water. "I mean, I am a much better actor than that creep, and they only call me on for a few episodes. That little creep is in the entire season!" Goku nodded crudely, then stiffled some laughter. "You don't expect to get in for too many episodes though? Looking like that? I'm surprised they hired you at all. Ugly bastard..." he stood up and went to converse with some of the other cast members. King Cold sighed again, and wiped away a tear. But he couldn't cry for long, as his son walked up to him almost instantly.  
  
"Daddy, I want to go home now. All the other people are picking on me again because of the time they saw me in the gay bar." He sulked and sat next to his father.  
  
"Who is it this time kiddo?"  
  
"It's Yamcha and Kuririn! I want to stand up for myself, but I know they'll just beat me up." King Cold nodded, and allowed his son to cry on his shoulder. Meanwhile, at the other end of the set, Trunks was reviewing his lines.  
  
"So you want to see my... sabre... no. Flashlight! Oh, wait. That's not it. Dad! Get over here and help me, will ya?" Angrily, he sat down on a stool, and burried his face in his hands. Cautiously, Vegeta walked up next to his son.  
  
"You... you wanted to see me son?" His stuttering reflected just how nervous he was at the time. He was clearly intimidated by his son's presence.  
  
"Yeah. I can't get my damn lines right! This script is stupid! Why'd you have to make me audition. You know I'm not some drama geek like you were in high school. Besides, I could be spending some time with my girlfriend right now!"  
  
"Umm..." Vegeta searched for a response to this. "Wha.. what line i...i...is it, T...t...trunks?" Their conversation continued on, and Vegeta tried his hardest to help his son. Elsewhere, not too far away from the set, some of the actors were taking a smoke break. Gohan had just arrived, and was currently lighting up. When his matches failed, Bulma handed him her lighter.  
  
"Thanks Bulma. Really needed a hit. That asshole Trunks is driving me insane. Can't he get a single line right!?  
  
"Uhh... Gohan, maybe that's not such a..." Yamcha tried to warn Gohan in time, but it was too late. Bulma snapped. She punched Gohan in the gut, and he doubled over in pain.  
  
"Bitch! What the hell was that for?"  
  
"You're a little slow today Gohan! Trunks is my son, you idiot!" she kicked him quite hard in the groin, and stormed off. Yamcha watched in disbelief, but before he could react, Puar interupted.  
  
"Shouldn't you follow her, Yamcha? You'll never get laid again if you don't act nice!"  
  
"Shut the hell up, cat-boy! You don't know anything about women! You're fixed for kami's sake!"  
  
"Fuck, Yamcha! Can't you keep that little bastard under control!?" Annoyed, he tossed his cigorette butt to the ground and walked back onto the set. Trunks still wasn't ready for his scene, so they still had a little while. Looking to the side, he noticed Chaotzu, Tenshinhan, Kamesennin and Chichi, all having some tea around a table. He was tempted to join them, but quickly remembered what the bunch was like. Shuddering, he walked on, just as Turtle walked over to the group.  
  
"Have you seen the new Brad Pitt movie though? He's so much better looking than Tom Cruise!" Chichi swooned. Before she could rave on about his dashing good looks, she was interrupted by Kamesennin.  
  
"You're crazy! That Matt Damon fellow is hotter than the two of them combined!" he gave a little perverted laugh, and Tenshinhan moaned.  
  
"What about me though, Roshi? I thought I was the greatest guy in the world!" That last squeak came from Chaotzu. He was upset and moved away from Kamesennin, who he was previously snuggled up against.  
  
"Now Chaotzu, you know that you're ten times better looking than any actor in the world!" Kamesennin gave Chaotzu a quick kiss. Not that it was noticible with all of his makeup on. Tenshinhan smacked himself in the head and groaned.  
  
"Chaotzu, why the hell are you doing this!? You're royalty! You should be with a nice princess, not some dirty old man!" Right before he had a chance to respond to the remark, a loud voice boomed across the entire set.  
  
"QUIET ON THE SET! TRUNKS VS. KING COLD TAKE 108!" The director was ready to begin filming again. Everyone looked over to the location. Trunks was ready for his line again. Crossing their fingers, they all watched, hoping that he'd get it right this time.  
  
"So, you wanna see my sword, huh?" Trunks asked. King Cold was relieved. He smiled. And stopped short.  
  
"Ummm.... yes?" he adlibbed. Everyone groaned. They were in for a long day.


End file.
